Bubba and the Badly Broken Bones

Spoiler: Bubba is fine now!  In fact, he hasn’t even slowed down…

Warning: There is a graphic, stomach turning picture after the break…

The Dreaded Portal

Bubba passed yet another childhood milestone last week: he broke both bones in his left forearm.  I’ll tell the story in his words:

My dad and my brother were playing zombie tag and I was sitting on the fort, just enjoying the night.  My brother ran up to the fort, which was home base, and yelled.

It startled me and I fell backwards.  As I was falling, I thought, “Hmm, do I want to break my arm or do I want to break my neck?”

I was already in my jammies when I heard the scream.  I threw my shoes in my purse, packed Bubba’s arm in frozen tater-tots and corn, and raced for the Emergency Room.

Once he calmed down, Bubba was hilarious about the whole thing: “Mom, my arm looks like Harry Potter’s when his bones were magicked away,” and “Mom, my arm looks like a cool skateboard ramp.”

The best was when the ER doctor came to temporarily set the bones.  Imagine a grizzled doctor who’s been on his feet for the past twenty hours, dealing with drug seekers, hypochondriacs, and whiners.  He knelt down in front of Bubba (who was getting loopy on painkillers) and told him he would have to set the arm.  “I’ll be very fast, but I’m not going to lie to you: it’s going to hurt.”

“That’s okay,” said Bubba.  “You have to do your job.”  I couldn’t decide whether to laugh or cry!

They set the bones as well as they could and put a temporary splint on Bubba’s arm - he decided the splint made him look like Hellboy.  We got a referral to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon and headed home for the night.

The next day I got my first good look at the X-rays:

*shudder*

Bubba had broken both his ulna and radius.  The pediatric orthopedic surgeon was optimistic that he could set the bones manually while Bubba was under general anesthetic, but he also prepared us for the worst: pins and lots of them.

I was a wreck, and Bubba was disappointed that he still couldn’t go to school.  When I tried to explain what was going to happen, he stopped me from going into too much detail:  “It’ll just freak me out, Mom.”

Thursday, we were at the hospital at o’dark thirty, checking in and getting ready for surgery.  Bubba was cracking jokes and asking questions about all the equipment.  When a nurse came to take his blood pressure and made a comment about “squeezing his muscle,” Bubba told her that he knew she was measuring his blood pressure and counting his pulse.  After that, no one talked down to him!

But, of course since this is my child…  One of the new policies at the hospital is for the patient and the doctor to discuss which limb is to be operated on, and then to mark it together with a washable marker.  One of the nurses gave Bubba the marker just before the doctor came to speak with us.  Approximately thirty seconds later, Bubba was covered in marker…  A little rubbing alcohol and some embarrassed scrubbing and Bubba was ready to go.

They wheeled him away at eight, and I went to the waiting room to fret and worry.  I had my giant sweater for some brainless knitting, and I actually finished the buttonband and trim while I was waiting.

Shortly after nine, the doctor came in to tell me that everything had gone perfectly.  He had been able to set Bubba’s arm manually - no pins and no surgery!  The doctor is an absolute genius.  If you’re ever in the area and need a referral to a good pediatric orthopedic surgeon, let me know.

Bubba slept and slept in recovery, and by one o’clock he was ready to go home.  By dinner time you would have never guessed that this boy had gone under general anesthesia twelve hours earlier!

Going Home

Friday, Bubba went back to school.  As soon as he walked in the door, all of his classmates rushed to give him hugs and sign his cast.  They had missed him just as much as he had missed them.  He came home with his cast filled with signatures:  everyone from his best friend to the principal signed their names.

Except for the obvious fiberglass monstrosity on his arm, Bubba hasn’t let this slow him down a bit.  I, on the other hand, still jump every time I hear a shout or a thump.  I think it will be quite a while before everything goes back to normal for me.